Not an Eulogy

(Eulogy: a speech or piece of writing that praises someone or something highly, especially a tribute to someone who has just died.)

My friend's grandmother died recently.. she was well past her 90's. She had physical difficulties, associated with old age, but mentally she was amazingly young and sharp. But what mattered most was, she was a golden example of treating everyone, including herself in a humane way... it took me a long time to realize her qualities, and even longer to write about it down. As she would be the last person, who would expect an eulogy... and that's why 'this is not an Eulogy'. She just lived her philosophy rather than preaching it...  And, its my need to write, share my sense of wonder.. remember!

I met her, when i visited my friend's house. But didn't interact much in the initial years. She was already in her 80's and dealing with multiple physical ailments, and thus restricted in her movements. And even when i met and talked with her, it was in a polite, distant way. What can there be common between us?

But, slowly i realized, even though she knows and interacts with 1000's of people, she has a way of making everyone who talks with her feel special. She literally knows and interacts with that many people. But, when she talks with you, she would focus totally on that interaction, without being overpowering in any way. She was one of the best communicators i ever met.

I used to meet her, once or twice a year or less. But, she would remember, what we had talked last time, or even before, and will ask about that. And always in a polite, nice way. When with her, I wouldn't feel a need to analyze and complicate anything, she imbibed her sense of tranquility without being passive, to others. And thus there is not much description about her, but only appreciation of her qualities.

I have met many people who were miserable in their old age. Of course, its a time of multiple disabilities, loss of power, control and being close to an end with reduced hope as well.. and its understandable, that they would focus more on self centered communication, and often one way talk with reduced listening and feedback.

I always remember her as a shining example of how best a human being can become, and sustain it till the very end. Despite whatever limitations she faced, always radiated composed, secure and peaceful aura around her. May her spirit live forever!