humanism v/s...

what is humanism? 

i have seen a rise in viral videos (youtube mostly) by various activists, who are trying to lobby for their groups...  and in many, humanism is seen as not good, and group specific 'ism' as the only way to get ahead.  and its really disturbing, as these own group promoters seem to be un-aware of its future consequences. 

how do they plan to go ahead into future?  if each group tries to get their rights, without thinking about integration, wouldn't it give rise to more competitions and rivalry?  where are the people, who voice the need to have an inclusive, all humans as equal??  a humanism, where human rights of everyone is respected, without trying to categorize them into a group... shouldn't it go viral everywhere? 

(i added, 'should', because, i feel, everyone of us humans have faced some kind of human right violation or other..  and still, it hasn't become THE most important focus, or a demand of every human being alive). 

some of the examples, i have seen in popular media are, femin-ism, caste-ism, religion-ism, national-ism, rac-ism, special condition-ism (based on conditions like, physiological impairments &/ conditions..  here the brain is considered as part of physiology or our body)...  and so on.  Shouldn't any group, be asking for universal human rights first... where their own group also would be included automatically? 

of course, each group can focus their activities on a select number of people, but along with that, trying to spread 'humanism', where all humans also should have equal rights be voiced? ...  otherwise, wouldn't a person from one group-ism be seen as, working on their own ends, without regard for others?

well...  i guess, it all will depend on the vision each person has..  how they want to see a distant future of the world, whether they will be living or not.  could there be a vague idea, what we all should believe in, to have a well functioning world, at least in future? 

i hope to hear some comments this time... questions, ideas, solutions, facts, anything...  but do think what kind of world would you want this to become... and voice it, express it, share it... spearhead it.. 

why dont they stop this disgusting behavior?

well, a friend asked, another friend from India..  the question above. 

of course, the Indian friend couldn't believe it..  disgusting behavior? in india? impossible! 

what was the behavior? they were sitting on a bus, and as they inched for an hour through heavy traffic, on wayside, the foreigner on first trip to india, could spot, people peeing and spitting blood red liquid, as well as throwing waste, even glass bottles in public places.  other people just walk nonchalantly around as if all this behavior is invisible. 

a culture clash of course...  and what was the point of contention?  disgusting.  for the person from local area, disgusting about india or indians was offensive... anything that touches patriotic pride is to be eliminated at once.

(probably because that's all there remaining from the glorious history - i might be walking in pee, spit, plastic & food waste, but my great grandfather lived in a golden city full of intellectuals... and that's what matter.   and you might be living in clean & systematic way now, but your great grandfather was hanging around with bunch of monkeys... so you are a looser.  and its ancestors who decide your status, not you). 

forget the above para in brackets... and lets get back to the first question...  is it a good thing to have public places turned into all kinds of waste dump?  if an ebola like disease reaches india, can anyone even imagine how quickly it will spread?  so, it would be a good idea to think about, how to change such disgusting and destructive behavior...  but, then, what would be the FIRST reaction to such a comment? people who do it, or who tolerate it, will often come up with an angry reaction... and defend or block the other person's question.

its a cultural difference, you wont understand.  or, some of the people do it, not everyone does it.  its changing gradually, you will find it only in some places.  its the un-educated people who keep doing it, they have no sense.  (these could be some defensive responses... and there could be some outright angry and counter offensive questions too... like, "what about high divorce rate in your country?")

anyway, the observation here - is about, what triggers these reactions... first in the case of a foreigner and then in the case of the native / local person? 
...even if a cultural habit, or common behavior is destructive, if its pointed out from a shocked view point or aggressive view point, - then, defensive or offensive reaction can be expected and it doesn't lead to solving that issue, but makes the environment even more toxic and aggressive.

so, even if we are disgusted by some behavior (kissing in public could be seen as disgusting by some indians, but enough is being written about kiss of love strikes these days)...  a reactionary comment arising out of indignity wouldn't be a good idea.  first try to think of it as, a behavior, born out of long years of repetition.  many people would not be aware of the overall impacts of such behavior, and they might look at it as, taking away their right.  for example, a person used to throw waste anywhere scot-free,  would consider it as inconvenience and infringement of personal right, if its denied... especially if its to be obeyed as a personal choice... and some others are still doing it around them, without having to pay any consequence.

so, in conclusion, that leads us to the tricky area of initiating a cultural behavior change.  do not explode immediately with your first reaction... when some different behavior occur.  think about, how inoffensively it can be presented/communicated.  what can the local people do by themselves to change such a behavior is the next question..  and local people should feel the solution idea occurred to them, and were not told / enforced with it.  and its them, who should be motivated to sustain the different healthy behavior... so, encouragement & support will be required. 

"whew! its tough".  my friend told me. even though i am saying all this now, its not easy to give a reactionary comment, when we see something different from our culture, age old habits.  but, we gotta try, because, i would prefer clean & hygienic public places.. 

how about free wi-fi everywhere?...  (well, that's another blog ;)

about a dog....

how do you tell a dog

how much you love its open show of affection?

A dog, nearing an year, already attained its youth physically,

but mentally still in a half puppy playfulness...

she is friendly, with everyone, as she had grown up so far,

in a relatively peaceful atmosphere, thanks to many humans..

and, always ready to play, run around, attention seeking

and at times, willing to just lie down and relax...

and raise her eyes in a soulful way, when awakened...

and, when you have to leave her at home,

as you have to go out on your own...

the dog, knows you are not taking her with you..

and looks at you, without anger, or hurt,

but only an innocent feel of her own sadness...

it hurts you to leave her like that... as she stands

silently..

and you remember, the other people, you have hurt

lashed out in your anger, demand, anything..

that same hurt, hits you, as you helplessly leave her

and walk ahead, alone, lost in thoughts..

wish i could be as non-judgmental as such a dog,

a state, where i am not wallowing in blame & pity

fill up my balloon of frustration, confusion i.e insecurity...

and i still walk away, realizing, whats being judgmental,

and wishing to practice it, even more in future.. 

 

why are you still single?

a friend who lives in turkey says..
basically a lot of people have asked me, why am i still single? he's in his late 30's..

i didn't know what to say..  but surprisingly a group discussion started with that.  there are married, singles and in relationship people in the group.  they start talking, as its a house gathering, where people just chill out and chat... its not a hectic party, but more focus on food and conversations...

prior to this group talk, 2 people had a private chat, but it became public, as both were trying to stress their point and unconsciously became loud in their volume..  no intervention was needed, as it was an intellectual debate and everyone know they end up as sum total of human intelligence (which is zero, if you count in IQ and if you count in stupidity, then have a unit which is in billions ;)

well..  it was interesting debate..  the man and the woman were discussing the status of their relationship or lack of it, and the group is a tolerant and liberal one, so, it was nothing new.  but, to reveal the hidden layers, they were discussing hypothetical questions..  which start with "what if"..

one of them, asked the other, "what if i hadn't moved away to another city at that time?  what would have happened to us then? or something hypothetical /imaginary question like that...  the other person gave a clear answer, "nothing much else would have happened, we had reached a stalemate situation with our friendship anyway"... (no puns intended and it was straightforward talk, as far as i know).    

anyway, that icy cool reply broke up that suspense and people re-gathered in new cliques.  a small TV was on somewhere with some football, and a small group checking out results of various clubs quickly.  an advt. interrupted it half way through.  couple of advt geeks moved into check new advts (believe me, there are people who like to watch advts and analyze them).

a new advt. came in, for an online shop.  (these days its either online shop advt, or an advt to re-sell your used things bought online, through online again, so that you can buy more stuff online ;)
ok.. be patient..  i wont drift anymore... ;)

in this advt.  a young man & woman (husband & wife), are sitting together to buy furniture online.  the eager husband tell us, its him, who is is going to shop for furniture, as if its a rocket science.  his wife, is sitting next to him, holding his hands and with wide eyed anticipation.
and he orders something, his wife immediately corrects him, and keeps changing the details slightly, till he ends up ordering what she wants.  it was supposedly funny, where one partner in relationship was doing major 'backseat driving'.  couple of viewers laughed out loud at such an obvious stereotype...

the advt. was over, football stat graphs appeared, and advt. geeks moved away to start analysis of that advt.  one said, "it was not a nice advt.  but, such nasty people, who manipulate their relationships exist and its a major pain to deal with them..  as they are always trying to control slyly.  some of them dont even realize that they are doing such a nasty thing, and it hurts their relationships & others too".

another joined in..  it was the turkish friend.  he said, "now i know, the answer to the question, so many people asked me before..  why am i still single?.   this was in a different track from the advt. but interesting enough to find out, so the group asked for explanation. 

he answered, "because, i am frank and honest to the point of brutality, when it comes to a close relationship.  i would like to dig deep and discuss even hypothetical questions...  and it would be a partnership, where future of that partnership wouldn't be per-determined... 

i do see many potential partners, who want to live the way its shown in movies and advt's..  where the partners/couple have to love whatever the other likes and profess love through rituals shown in movie/advt as proof of true love, without realizing why they do it.  they remain shallow and their relationship as well, and they fear change the most.  how can someone exist in such a relationship, where dying together in old age is goal, even though for which you are willing to sacrifice exploration of life?  aren't they remaining in such closed relationships, becoz they haven't been exposed to emotionally open relationships?

to be precise, he continued..  i will say just this, "i prefer emotionally open relationship, without conditions and demands... so i am still single..  does that make sense to you?

fortunately, this shocking statement, did have a supporter in the group, who added.   "if this answer of yours, doesn't reach out to the other person, then there is no point, trying to make him/her understand your attitude.   

another added, its liked from the movie, 'instinct'..  we all act as takers, not only with nature... but with each other as well..  as if, we are all going around with a begging bowl, pleading, 'love me, give me affection, give me respect, make me feel good, make me happy'..  to others, and as if that is not enough, to mythical gods and powers as well..

'the dinner is served', announcement rang at that moment, and made everyone self aware and all moved towards the ultimate truth, one plate at a time ;)

Oopar Oopar song lyrics & translated to english from hindi

life is best enjoyed, when you're HIGH on life.. (the title of the music video) - hindi lyrics with rough english translation below each stanza

dua pakad ke, oopar aagaya, oopar se sab saaf dikhe,

satya hai kya, sansar ka ab duniya ka mai-baap dikhe

(catching smoke, i came up high, and from high (above), everything is seen clearly,

what is truth, society and the whole world's mother-father (essence) is seen

yahan breeze bahoot hai tandi tandi tandi tandi

manne, oopar oopar rehne de... (2)

oopar oopar rahne de, manne, oopar rahne de

(here, there is very cold breeze...

(let) me, stay high high)

raz booz par loot raha hoon,

dhassa dhasa jaata hoon,

jeevan kaisa joke hai saala, hasa hasa jaata hoon

(spending on booze,

i remain down,

life seems like a joke, i keep on laughing..)

gas phoos pe lot raha hoon, roll roll kar jalna

road badi hai, rough jeevan ki, phook phook kar chalna

(i am lying on grass, keep rolling and burning

the road of life is tough, blow out and keep walking)

taxi kar ke aaya jahan, 3D sapnon ka jharna,

gadi-yaan saari melt hui, sab slow-motion pe karna

(i came here in taxi, in a 3D dreams waterfall

all the clocks have melted, do everything in slow-motion)

broken dil pe joint laga le, duniya flower-pot dikhe

chada jo parvat ki choti pe, mujhko bole-nath dikhen

(in your broken heart, put a joint, the world will be seen as flower-pot,

when climbed the peak of mountain, i saw 'bole-nath' / shiva the god)

yahan breeze bahoot hai, tandi tandi

manne, oopar oopar rehne de... (2)

oopar oopar rahne de, manne, oopar rahne de

(here, there is very cold breeze...

(let) me, stay high high)

jeevan ki mahatva-kamkshaon mein, jeevan ka sukh kho jaata hai

armanon ka kiye karaye ko, frustration ka flush dho jaata hai

pyar, mohabbat, kasmein, vaadein, yeh sab bus.. kujli-yaan hai

aam to bas yeh khqas pal hain, baaki sab to gutli-yaan hain,

yeh sansar ek rang manch hai, jahan sab ko apna role nibhana hai,

role banana hai, banana fal hai.. aur fal ki chinta na karna hi, jeevan ka hal hai..

jab zindagi phode bumb, bol BUM...

(in the ambitions of life, happiness gets lost from life,

when desires create chaos, flush of frustration cleans up..

love, affection, vows, promises, all these are... mere irritants

important is this present moment, all else is worthless (like a shell)

this world is a stage, where all have to do their role,

have to make roll, and banana is a fruit (its connected in sarcastic word play)

and not thinking about the fruit (of our efforts) is the solution to life

when life explodes a bomb, say BUM (a prayer to shiva)

manne, oopar oopar rehne de... (2)

oopar oopar rahne de, manne, oopar rahne de (2)

oopar oopar rahne de (2)... manne...

(let) me, stay high high)

#oopar oopar renn de, #oopar oopar rehne de #song lyrics #lyrics oopar oopar song #english translation of hindi song oopar oopar.

chess...

a child's first question could be,

“what is it?”

or would a child think,

why the hell did you

take me out of such

a warm cocoon,

where i am fed, cared

without the need to

lift even a finger...

(except maybe smile

couple of times,

when sonography is done)...

well, i am drifting away

from the question...

what is it? Keeps happening

at other times too..

like when you connect

converse with ease

and chat for an hour...

(in real life nobody's got time

for, focused conversation with

a single person, continuously ;)

well, then you end up asking,

what is it?

What kind of friendship do we have

and where would it go...

when its a guy and you too are a guy

then it doesnt go that way...

questions doesnt arise..

(i.e. If the guys are straight)

how does it go with

girl-girl thing..

i really dont know now..

but then, cant there be

a genderless community?

Where there are only

human-human things?

When you are young,

you move on quickly

rush into an answer

either way..

when you are beyond 40's

then you tend to play

some more mental chess (MC)..

only difference in MC is

there are no pawns..

they can be called as hope,

and you have to move them ahead

often only 1 step at a time..

though when you are young,

you might get a chance

to do a double move

though its an option...

and thus hope moves us ahead

and we tend to become pawns

(or even if we consider our self

rook, queen or king)...

we all have to move in the

64 square board of life...

often unable to predict the

moves of our partner.. or competitor

but if taken with sporting spirit,

its all fun..

and play a good game,

with zest and energy

consideration and with fair play

its just a life long game...

play on!

how would 2015 be?

What would you say, are the worst problems of the present time? I guess such a question is appropriate now, as its end of 2014, and a new year is coming up.

2015 is going to be an epoch year... its going to bring about so many changes from earlier traditional rituals and behavior.. the current year has already proved, how rapidly change is happening, especially in this 21^st century.

So, what would you guess, will be the biggest change makers next year? Internet speed? Mobile phone technology? Oil prices? Gender equality? Human rights? Well, its not easy to think from an international point of view... or world level.. so, think also about, the biggest change maker in your local area, in your local community (wherever you will be for the next 1 year).

What would be the biggest block for positive change / improvement in the next year?

Politics? Religion? Dictatorship /fascism? Gender oppression? Child rights? Human rights violations? War? Weather? Sex? … (again think from world view and local view, so come up with 2 major blocks, or same block can be there for both)..

think what it could be, from your point of view.

....  ...  ... from my point,  some of the above points are:

Well.. I am thinking too.. institutionalized religion could be a major block, is one of my draft guesses (draft idea – where draft means - a preliminary version of a piece of writing).. or it might be 'family' system... (already there is a blog in here below somewhere, which is about, how 'family' actually leads to cliques, groupism, and reduced cooperation).

Travelling (backpacking) alone, to meet new people & cultures, would be the biggest catalyst next year, to lead us to world peace... (well, my personal opinions).. and genderless, casteless, ageless, religionless, nations-less, greed-less world is what I will be hoping for...

that is, bit more better than this year... and not a sudden change into total utopia... ;)

also, connecting with people, share positivity, would be something I hope will happen more next year, if you also want that to happen... do get in touch with whoever you want to get in touch with ASAP ;)

what am i afraid off?

there is a question, i am afraid off...  it is,
"why don't you go one or few more steps ahead of the way you've chosen?
"why are you still afraid - for example of the society?
such questions...

but then, "do i ask people such a question?
yes, i often do (at times, silently, in my mind)

there are many possible retorts.. one liners, which can be used to block...
"have YOU done it?
"why are you telling ME?  and not instead tell it to YOURSELF?  or
"the FOCUS is you, not me...

but are they convincing enough for you?

let me give an example.. otherwise it can be too complex ;)

from my personal life, as i dont wear footware, someone asked me,
"why do you stop just at footwear?  why not reduce other needs too, and not wear any clothes at all? ...why dont you show how brave you are to the society?

well..  i was dumbstuck, when someone asked me this question..  (its the exact type of question, i mentioned above).
...of course, one reasons is..  i will develop at MY OWN speed.. not at the speed others want me to.
but, then, dont I push others to increase their speed of development.. becoz its for their own good?

i do.  i confess..  and, will definitely try to work on my rudeness..  but,

it still doesnt answer my question..  how can you show someone, that they are pushing YOU too far?
how can you block such a question in a nice manner?

(this time, i leave you, without my attempt at answer..  becoz, i am still thinking about it).

blog idea turns in to blog ;)

blog idea: the longing for alpha male, is often depicted as the only or best love partner for females..

(one example which hit me right now was, a scene from the movie, percy jackson and lightning thief.. alexandra daddario and percy's fight scene. (I dont know which actor plays percy) where only after percy defeats her in a sword fight, and comes out as a champion of that school/group, her love lights up?

Though, its never that often for men... any (good looking) orphan can be his (hero's) damsel in distress... isn't time to throw away that archetype?

… and stories from other point of views are not likely to appear in main stream media or most popular media.. i.e. ordinary people finding their preferred partner in a cooperative way (rather than competitive... I am gonna tear your guts.. intensity?)

Why cant 2 people not bothered by each others status, but LIKE each others company be together? Two people who are Compatible get together?

And it shouldn't be termed or viewed as derogatory or out of selfishness or lone focus on money... (that's how mainstream media tend to show such relationships... of course, there could be such relationships, but there are positive relationships, even though those 2 people can be different from each other in multiple ways -

one example i feel is, from 'game of thrones, season 1 - the relationship between Khal Drogo & Daenerys Targaryen - (if you haven't seen it or read the book, please try it)... its a fictional story written by RR Martin, but, it does show, there are multiple shades to such relationships, and not just a single point of view.  its not an exact example, but i am using it to convey an idea...

its such a sad world at times, but the good thing about it is..

it gives us so many opportunities to improve ourselves so easily..

keep going..

december blues

hi... am a bit down now,
as new year is approaching
what did i do in this whole year?

is a question which keeps falling
like snow in winter...

an anti-depressant of
counting newly acquired frnds
on FB is at times effective,...
 like a modern yoga pose!

it works like this...
stare at your smartphone,
swipe, swipe, stare...
give a mirthless laugh,
Like Conan does,
in his online comics...

are we too in now?
inside the net... Internet?

its a joke...

Looking now into the next day,
imagining the question it will unfold,

As today, i have folded up some questions
into the shape of answers,
with a slight idea that they were
half the truths...

which makes the future, our true friend
as they show us what is
real, truer & lasting...
often presenting it in dark humorous way,

what can i do, expect
bear this whacky friend
while improving MY
sense of humour...