thanks to this blog editors for publishing this. i've been backpacking since september 2015, through south of india. climbed up from kerala to gokarna and now goa.
chilling out with all kinds of backpackers and travellers is my occupation now. took some time to decide and jump out of routine and socially accepted life... but guess there was no need to worry or think so much. all the people (most) are super supportive and peaceful, and never enjoyed such open discussions so much.
being with people from multiple countries kinda makes one understand different cultural practices and to some extent, the gender divide has disappeared. of course, it started with me, when i started looking at myself not as a female of male, and it kinda began to express in interactions with others.
sometimes, i met people, formed into a close group, and had intense interactions and insights... strangers became kindred souls within hours. stranger than fiction experiences became daily occurrence.
hmm.... i will write more later ;)
Tuesday, December 29, 2015
Tuesday, August 11, 2015
Like Buddha’s Eyes
Like Buddha’s Eyes (2015): (SF, which can be seen as science or strange fiction)
The year is 2992.
Everyone is looking forward to the next millennium, just 8 years ahead. The 365 days calendar is hotly debated, but
the world still sticks to it. The
physicists to their theoretical models
of space travel methods. Man had imagine
flights since millenniums, but it was possible in the beginning of last
one. Sometimes progress was like
that.
“Pharmaceutical industry which gobbled up food and
health sectors into it, had become the biggest producers now. Can you guess why? N1 asked.
The Questions had to come. As the
discussion was started by R1. The pre-fest sleep sessions were full of such
chatter. The designers anticipation
always made a rest difficult state to achieve.
The camp was on top of a hill, overlooking a layered
valley. There were spots, with varied
vegetation. Where nature was left
untouched by humans. Safety policies
disallowed large areas to be totally wild
the one semi-permanent tent like structure, on top of that hill
contained 5 people, all young and designing their first big fest scene. It was a low to mid level fest, bu for young
one’s each step up were a big one. There
were more concerned about the new policies added into NE and & NED – neuro
energizers and neuro energizer inducers.
The super NE & NEI’s were common place. The next levels were under restricted
use. Those big pharma producers are
behind the new restrictions, D3 aired ,with an emotional stress added for
effect, in his voice. N1 countered, ïts
a cliché. These lines been uttered, for centuries by new gen rebels.
Don’t quote from top 100 blog classics. D3 added in a subdued way, to indicate
withdrawal.
CR1 exclaimed, from half sleep mode. Its from ideas for a genderless society,
right? If you review the old clips,
shown as docu3, it’s a good rip for funny situations. The others realized probably it’s a half a
plan for the scene.
Lets not go into that now, L7 voiced as the convener
of that group. Observe, bu intervene
only when necessary, for the whole group, is what conveners role is. The role was not so enjoyed, as often
convener is seen as a blocker, though now, it was accepted above desk job, as a
temporary project.
L7 reminded his console that, these names are not full
names, and used in an informal friendly way.
Console will edit all those names.
People with higher status had short names, the rest didn’t.
D3 was in a rebellious mood. It seems like even today we are acting like
pre 2000. They used to call drugs, as
mind expanders, without knowing, what mind is, or expansion is. Such idiocy.
L7 immediately intervened, technology hadn’t developed that much in las
millennium and adjusted his console to
keep out disagreements. One of the
youngsters almost snapped, keep those controls for the party.. that’s when you will need to so much ego
energy.
L7 put console in auto mode and replied, in neutral
tones. “but party is where we are
supposed o let go, as much as possible”.
It was a non-sequitur, but a reply was popular in underground. Ÿeah, exactly’’. But pre-party’s are supposed to be
unregulated, that’s designers of event or scenario creators are supposed to let
go. There was no policy, and as adjusted
by console, no one was in mood for disagreement.
N1 started b a story as usual. Almost upto first third of this millennia,
organic learning concept was unheard off.
People were taught set information as knowledge or even wisdom. Within set time. They mostly ran away from nature, they
suppressed their olfactory, smell instincts. They had no smelters or consoles
for smell based experiences. The first
smell based producers were called as mad scientists. But that revolutionized everything. Smell consoles were widely used initially
that voice wandered off.
D3 or someone pushed the next wave, lets plan for the
scene. Where do you all want smell
consoles, auditory waves, visuals if any.. and wandering boundaries.. and special effects. There we need deas. Something new to push the boundaries. A bit, just a bit. L7 added.
Something simple, based on natural setting here, they are the most
participated and shared. Like the
compare grass and sand walk at that beach scene. D3 was quick to interject, that’s from the
80’s or even 70’s. an old phrase, though
helps to focus on a new idea. CR1 added,
we all seem to be so in the past. We
need to move out of a conditioned state.
But it went on, even that’s from past and all laughed.
L7 brought out a map of the venue. It had to keep a sense of time at times as
well. It was a view of valley from
above, with depths just as someone started, lets.. holograms of positions where dancers moving
appeared. Even the graphics seemed to
emit a passion, even at that small size.
2-3 fingers pointed at the rock formations, it zoomed in. there were flat enough surfaces to stand and
dance. D3 clicked his fingers, people
appeared standing there started dancing.
It was already programmed.
Difficulty levels, expert level, probabilities of falling and injuries
and treatment possible, health and fitness levels required, etc. came up on the
side.
Other possible places, came up with stats. Possible modifications to make the experience
better were shown, with minimum changes in nature. When D3 probed to modify some stag and light
structure additions, a caution signal came up, indicating, too much fiddling
with nature. D3 made a swear sound, and
immediately regretted, as he knew N1 would start a story.
N1 started, swearing was considered fashionable and
early millennium people used to swear a lot.
Conscious expanders were considered illegal and not much researched
on. Even natural herbs and plants were
banned and users were seen as criminals.
Just like those early sexuality typology they used to have, and other
than one type was considered as criminal.
The pharmaceutical producers themselves lobbied o keep them
illegal. Addictions were feared and very
low tech drugs were only available.
Whole battalions of enforcement professionals, often called generally as
police, existed for such a war on drugs.
Genocides were common too.
Systems were obsessed with control and huge numbers of people were
trained to observe, detect and catch all sorts of people and keeping them in
one closed location was the major rehabilitation method.
Even CR1 enjoyed this one. But still made fun of N1. You N1 are like that widipedia they used to
have then. Everyone laughed.
D3 added, do you all remember those early publicity
material they used to show on their audio-visual channels.. all those brands
were pushing ‘mind boosters’ even though initially they had not much idea about
neurons and their chemicals.
L7 broke in.
whats now known as infoshare was called publicity and before that as
advertisement. But all that changed,
after the first drug-war, even though they expected to have oil and water wars
before that. Of course, the population
was like 10 billion then, and insecurity & completion were enormous and
part of their psycho-culture. Then L7
sated in a different tone, lets all get back to party, take up individual parts
and connect them on hologram model. Then
we take a good break. The group vibe is
ideal for it now.
The party was a success. As usual a documentary of it was put on at
end, in same typical pattern. About 70
people had great fun and even though our group’s act was not the main ones, it
was noticed. Their audiology effects had
lead to ‘the crawl’ even. On 6th
day, it winded up for the post party scene.
Some old timers talked about month long festivals from their time. But nowadays health departments made it tough
to have hat long scenes. The drugs used
for hyper stamina known as postponers were the reason. Week long used was considered fine for most
people.
When ‘like buddhas eyes’ was invented, there were
strong protests. Basically about its
effect on eyes, which formed as if lotus petal like shape. The inventors claimed, its because the brain
became calm and relaxed, like that old nirvana concept of Buddha. That’s why eyes also shaped up like that and
its not a base physical molecule. The
protesters had attacked exactly that.
That it’s a molecule which causes only physical change and a pre
millennium low-tech product. Now as
there are multiples generations of that molecule has been spliced and
synergized, the first version was totally neglected.
The documentary kept on – projecting all these
information. And at health body
spokespersons congratulated the event creators for keeping it within a week,
and following policies. Most of the
audience were zombied out and such a droning documentary was preferred.
The 4 from the event group, celebrated by going to a
beach. There was a huge event, with 10
days full of scenarios. The bigger one’s
could get away with few less restrictions.
The 4 wanted to mingle and share their design samples as well. Maybe chat with some big names. More than a 1000 people were expected. The beach shaped like two half circles joined
together. A floating stage would be set
up in the middle, people can dance on sand, or shallow sea water. Underwater dance suits were also there, where
water added to audio & visuals.
CR1 and D3 teamed together to record data and ideas to
be modified later for their scenes. L7
even though was congratulated by health groups, had taken a break and gone to
find new group. Generally conveners left
groups unless under special circumstances of policy breaking. Its not easy for convener to go against
policies because they have to take certain splices (of molecules) to do their
role, and those splices keep them to the policies. Though as usual some had found way out
through experimentation.
A new convener had joined the group to make it 5 again. Its name was bit tough to shorten and ended
up as Y1. It was not an experienced
convener and the other 4 were lucky to get such a one. Y1 often ended sentences with a why, instead
of stating. An inexperienced convener
were preferred, with a hope to get by through policy loop holes. The names were given as alphabets and
numbers, which was easier to code into teraputers. Space had its share of satellites and putters,
but somehow land was considered safer.
The names were short for the first gen persons, but
later borns were getting longer names.
The length of the name began to indicate a status and the younger gen
started identifying each other they know with short names. A culture derided silently by the
elders. For example, N1 could have been AC3Y2N1. But unless required to state in formal policy
forms, it preferred N1. Other codes
indicated its region colony, and genotypes.
Though the population growth was controlled on basis of eco-balance,
shorter names were highly sought. The
machines which prepared to grow from conception till adulthood would keep the
people in stasis, where time stops existing for them, tilt ere are vacancy to
be brought out. Human rights of an
individual began only after machine-birth and quality testing period was complete. Till then it was considered incomplete, as a
bio-product. When it started, there were
hue & cry about lack of children and its implications on overall
development. The policy makers played it
very clever and allowed anyone to have children, but they also had to take
responsibility of it till adulthood, with all the human rights. That ended it.
Y1 continued with his sensory posts infogram. It moved into current news. Another interesting forethought which is
coming up is allow evolution to take place’ movement. Its also opposed as ‘genecide’. Letting particular genetic material to die
out. The pro-evolution groups wanted to
liberalise all new drug use, and encourage experimental groups, who tried to
develop new drugs or synergetic molecules.
Hey have a new argument, which is from past; the alcohol rules cycle. From beginning of millennia, anto-alcohol
lobbying had grown due to risk to others.
By late 2020’s total alohol ban gained support. For almost a decade, it was banned. But along with end of war on drugs, alcohol
came back, and became viral. Again alc
ban gathered support. But new groups
emerged, which pushed for flood. A flood
of alcohol. A massive death toll then
pushed alcohol out, without policies.
The pro-evolution groups, argue, that the alcohol gene
got wiped out or formally was evolved out.
And thus, in the same way, total liberation of all brain transformers
should be encouraged to reach next level of evolution. As its all provided by nature. As guidance for evolving. Additionally hyper sports enthusiasts asked
to take away all the restrictions, as argued by pro-evo groups. But it was rejected as illogical. The high risk stunts done in hyper sports
have safety precautions, without that, it'd be like assisted suicide. Many hper-sports lobbyists protested by doing
high risk stunts and sharing them. Most
people realized, its just another excuse for hyper junkies to do stunts. Some referendum parties are expected to be
announced soon. This is end of
infograph, edited based on north east region perspectives today. Y1 turned his console into auto mode and left
it, moved to a beach cove, where rock formations had made a cozy cave for group
of 5 to plan next scenario. Probably
they can set up one in this festivities happening for pro-evo movement. In one with more neutral appearance. Y1 didn’t want to affiliate with any one
lobby, so early in his career.
With a sigh, the evaluator closed the program. He had seen enough. The characters with alpha-numerals instead
for names, did seem bit robotic.
Obviously the programmers of that AI had done a good job and will
receive technical credits. But as
psycho-linguistic and social scientist had reported, the AI’s creativity was
still a suspect. Their dialogues and
going aback into past and present to give connections for future probabilities
seemed still conditioned to their present and past. Somehow the experts throught were on brain
enhancers, but that’d be jumping ahead of time.
He was well aware of the policies and politics, otherwise he wouldn’t be
an evaluators evaluator.
Best to discard the whole AI future probability trend
tracker as an utter failure, he thought.
And base it on psycho-linguistic and social scientist oppositions to
it. They will be happy that, for once
social scientists were given preference.. ha!
I should go through it again, without any special
selfish reasons or biases. Maybe with
help of something to neutralize, like that Swiss import. This is a tough case and I deserve a
treat. But the decision could be
conveyed publically that the project is discarded. The technical team will be disappointed,
maybe they had already dreamt about Uber prize.
Uber and his handheld hydrogen bomb had wiped out almost a country back
then, but someone’s joke of having an Uber prize for new discoveries and
inventions had caught on. So much of
history repeat loops. I might be
discarding an invisible man’ project.
The power to decide and influence world events, from far away, its
attractive.
He turned his attention back. The technical team will be given next
project. But they seem to lack
socio-cognitive aspects. And SC experts
lack technical boundary awareness. When
will both connect? Probably a synthesis
course activity must be prepared to train next AI developers first. Then it’d be ripe to try them out. He then made sure the last ideas been
recorded, and then closed the systems. Changed
his appearance for an outing. There were
events to select on his clock, and he selected 2 of them. First one experimental, even a bureaucrat
needs to have fun. He walked out.
x-----x---x
Tuesday, May 26, 2015
comic strip ideas..
1)
son: Dad, i cant take it any more. you are always controlling and pushy, and have my own life... i am going away never to return...
dad: are you stupid? come back home right now. you have no idea what life is. i have more than double your experience. how dare you tell me something like this...
son: final bye...
second dad: what? ok. son. its your life. your decisions from now on.
son: hey dad, since you can change yourself, i think i can change my this decision too. i am coming to meet you.
2)
backpacker: i am going away for a long travel, thinking, know myself, know spiritualism..
MBA friend: are you crazy? its the worst profession or career ever. you never get any money, majority will spit on your face, you will wander as a pauper, and end up sleeping in lonely places. chance of you succeeding (making money) is very low, one in a million. even if you become that 1 in a million, its generally only after your death, you become famous/ worshipped. check out, kabir he ended up as a poor weaver, jesus couldn't even continue his own family line.
backpacker: i am not trying to anyone... or earn money, i am trying to know myself.
friend: oh, do you mean, start an Ashram? that's a different deal altogether. its tough business, but, if you stick it out, then it can lead to a big trust, but, its a 24/7 acting job man.. think about that.
backpacker: as we always end our conversations in bye, here's one. . bye.
3)
have you ever heard of a gaali, dostchod?
no? well, it means, betrayer of own friend.
who comes up with gaali's and jokes? they are always anonymous people..
4)
Have you ever consumed (orally), any banned substance? have you done it repeatedly and enjoy it?
(how many people will have to say YES, if MSG is considered as banned substance & have eaten Maggi repeatedly? ;)
5)
How to make some a criminal?
Politician: Easy, Make whatever that person enjoy, an illegal thing through law!
son: Dad, i cant take it any more. you are always controlling and pushy, and have my own life... i am going away never to return...
dad: are you stupid? come back home right now. you have no idea what life is. i have more than double your experience. how dare you tell me something like this...
son: final bye...
second dad: what? ok. son. its your life. your decisions from now on.
son: hey dad, since you can change yourself, i think i can change my this decision too. i am coming to meet you.
2)
backpacker: i am going away for a long travel, thinking, know myself, know spiritualism..
MBA friend: are you crazy? its the worst profession or career ever. you never get any money, majority will spit on your face, you will wander as a pauper, and end up sleeping in lonely places. chance of you succeeding (making money) is very low, one in a million. even if you become that 1 in a million, its generally only after your death, you become famous/ worshipped. check out, kabir he ended up as a poor weaver, jesus couldn't even continue his own family line.
backpacker: i am not trying to anyone... or earn money, i am trying to know myself.
friend: oh, do you mean, start an Ashram? that's a different deal altogether. its tough business, but, if you stick it out, then it can lead to a big trust, but, its a 24/7 acting job man.. think about that.
backpacker: as we always end our conversations in bye, here's one. . bye.
3)
have you ever heard of a gaali, dostchod?
no? well, it means, betrayer of own friend.
who comes up with gaali's and jokes? they are always anonymous people..
4)
Have you ever consumed (orally), any banned substance? have you done it repeatedly and enjoy it?
(how many people will have to say YES, if MSG is considered as banned substance & have eaten Maggi repeatedly? ;)
5)
How to make some a criminal?
Politician: Easy, Make whatever that person enjoy, an illegal thing through law!
Sunday, April 26, 2015
sunday morning walk..
SR
series 1. something:
we
have to derive happiness from within. There should be inner peace..
or we should be striving for inner peace... As external sources, give
happiness for a temporary period, and generally comes with their own
negative price, and create further dependence.. (I have read, heard
and repeated these same things many times.. but, did I really
understand how to achieve internal source focus?)
I
was walking, in a morning.. its about couple of kilometers walk.. I
am barefoot as usual, and yesterday night, it had rained a lot. The
ground is just right for walking.. its soft, without being overly
moist...
after
few minutes, I see, a muddy patch, and its big.. with sticky mud and
very little water all around, without any gaps in them. I began to
curse my luck, what a lousy corrupt nation and narrow mentality of
our people... but, I had to walk through that anyway, so I went
ahead.. I will have to spend some time looking for water or
something to clean my feet later, I felt, and already started looking
for something..
then,
my feet send me, some pleasurable signals as well.. and I felt,
everything is not bad.. its bit slippery and squishy but, just a
small patch, in the 2 KM walk I am doing.
Then,
I realized, this is what is meant by deriving from internal source..
I could have, through encouraging view points (perspective) which
would lead to more distress and frustration in me. (they would lead
to connected hormones/chemicals being created in my brain, and it
will further influence my behavior. Probably, my body will become
tensed up, to be ready or prepared for such a load of difficulties
and unpleasant experiences further on too.. as a result I could end
up grouchy for the whole day probably... (and what will I do then? I
will wish for some external happening to change my state of mind, and
soon, would be dependent on external forces).
But,
as my thoughts changed, and realized, that generally what I consider
as unpleasant, is just another experience... and walking on soft
grounds was considered as happy thing by my own mind. (if I was
advised by a doctor to walk of mud, for some curative purpose, then I
would have hated walking on soft grounds, and would be searching for
mud to walk on ;)
The
lack of cursing (without an ulterior motive), and lack of efforts
(thoughts) to increase my frustrations, paid off immediately. I
started focusing more on the mud walk, and its finer details. My
body calmed down, and I relaxed gradually... and probably the
chemicals, which make me tense and be prepared for an crisis would
have reduced... and chemicals which give me feeling of well-being and
happiness flow in more.. after few minutes, I meet a person, another
walker, and its easy for me to share mentally with him, lots of
positivity...
I
rather like to add the neuro-chemicals, scientific explanations into
my reasoning. Some people can blindly go into Bhakti, devotion, or
faith like state. I feel it can be blinding, and there should be a
balance. Maybe we reach the same insights in different ways and
levels. But, overall, it was nice to have an insightful morning
walk.. especially on a lazy Sunday... ;)
Saturday, April 25, 2015
backpacking beach night...
it was night, and a group of backpackers decided to walk to beach nearby and have a campfire.. random group of people from various countries, cultures..
somebody talked about an incident from evening, where a police guy asked a local couple, whether they are married.. and it seemed almost like an interrogation... never seen them do that to foreigners..
some countries dont have a marriage system, it seems.. someone bit far from the fire mentioned. i turned around. it was interesting enough to stop staring at the flying bits of fire, going up fearlessly to meet the unending darkness around. (maybe everyone has that courage, when born.. humans train their children from that onwards, really hard, to turn them conventional)..
but, back to the conversation.. (its backpackers, friendly even in a serious discussion), so, even a statement like that got some innocuous replies first. though another one, similarly covered in darkness said, 'isn't it a leading question or statement? seems like, the moral judgement that marriage system is good is already been passed..
now it was getting warm.. conversation wise. (if you let yourself go with the flow, then backpacking nights lead to so many insightful discussions or even debates). somebody else asked.. what about your parents? if they hadn't stayed together while keeping the sanctity (of marriage), would you be like this here today?
another retorted (i am cutting away many details and sub points of the whole conversation, and writing only the relevant points.. otherwise, it will be like one novel). how much of marriage system is due to patriarchy? due to easy digestion of romantic books, TV, movie etc and cultural pressures?
would a mother, who is now in her 50's or 60's.. from a traditional country, opt to keep the marriage going, if she had enough freedom?
"yeah, its like that Clint Eastwood movie, 'bridges of Madison county'.. Meryl Streep's children find their mother's liberation as shocking..
how can one decide, what things their parents did, should be followed and what should not be followed? is there a logic to it all? will even 2 conventional people, brought up in a blinding middle class community, be agree to what's ok & whats not ok, in totality?
another quipped. lets not bring mothers into this. i respect mine and she has sacrificed a lot.
reply came for that immediately. yeah, but, now i can't help but ask one. would you be willing to live your life like your mother? you should totally be willing right?
another added.. you are drifting. so, lets get back to the old topic, before the mother statements came in. . its all like the question - what's faith and what is blind faith? can even two faithful people agree on that?
either you can break out and see things differently or not. and, i won't divide developed and developing countries.. more like, people with net access and without. as net gives lots of exposure... criss crossing information across world wide through social media and internet.. so, its a choice, whether to see beyond one's boundaries or not. another stated lazily..
(the waves in that beach, seemed to be doing just that kind of thing.. hitting with waves of logic, one after another, against the rigid, hardened land..)
at least the waves never give up, a sleepy voice indicate breaking up of that beach night gathering.
...... (other quotes from that night)...
"if you want freedom, and acceptance from others, to be the way you want, then,
you should be willing to let your mother do all those things as well.. can you? can she?
"to be free, one must be willing to give that same freedom to others as well - the more you practice control over others, you too will remain constricted and constipated".
"everyone complains about, injustice, unfair things happened to them.. or done to them... and the difficulties they have to face.
no one questions the opportunities they get, the happiness and freedom they currently have & had... that's taken for granted. and it creates an imbalance.. as even a small % of problems balloon up!"
...
"people think, its the desire to succeed, the strength of the will or wish, which leads us to that...
but isn't it the desire to do things (which may lead to success or happiness), which is to be strong?
"everyone has 1000's of wishes, but the person, who actively pursues by doing, is the person who succeeds. and sometimes, when a successful person, says on TV/print, that they never wished/expected/planned for it... some of the viewers feel jealous.. (how the hell did she/he got it? such a waste of all that fame/success. here i've been wishing for that since years and nothing).
often the wish or desire is for fame and worship.. which certain success can bring. and that takes the focus on to the fame/fandom... and distracts from actually accomplishing - as focus to achieve what needs to be done remains neglected.
these people become known as complaint boxes, or who perennially talk about all the misfortunes, that befall on them.
probably i would have said, in my younger years, to such a person.. "then why dont you wish for what you get easily? just wish - something should not happen".. then you will get what you want ;)
in sports, we do have such negative wishes, that team should not win, or should not score more than 1 goal.. etc. But negative wishes are draining.. (would you rather keep a goal, "i won't tell lies, or i won't be violent".. or i will be honest, or i will be peaceful? .. maybe its another blog altogether.
somebody talked about an incident from evening, where a police guy asked a local couple, whether they are married.. and it seemed almost like an interrogation... never seen them do that to foreigners..
some countries dont have a marriage system, it seems.. someone bit far from the fire mentioned. i turned around. it was interesting enough to stop staring at the flying bits of fire, going up fearlessly to meet the unending darkness around. (maybe everyone has that courage, when born.. humans train their children from that onwards, really hard, to turn them conventional)..
but, back to the conversation.. (its backpackers, friendly even in a serious discussion), so, even a statement like that got some innocuous replies first. though another one, similarly covered in darkness said, 'isn't it a leading question or statement? seems like, the moral judgement that marriage system is good is already been passed..
now it was getting warm.. conversation wise. (if you let yourself go with the flow, then backpacking nights lead to so many insightful discussions or even debates). somebody else asked.. what about your parents? if they hadn't stayed together while keeping the sanctity (of marriage), would you be like this here today?
another retorted (i am cutting away many details and sub points of the whole conversation, and writing only the relevant points.. otherwise, it will be like one novel). how much of marriage system is due to patriarchy? due to easy digestion of romantic books, TV, movie etc and cultural pressures?
would a mother, who is now in her 50's or 60's.. from a traditional country, opt to keep the marriage going, if she had enough freedom?
"yeah, its like that Clint Eastwood movie, 'bridges of Madison county'.. Meryl Streep's children find their mother's liberation as shocking..
how can one decide, what things their parents did, should be followed and what should not be followed? is there a logic to it all? will even 2 conventional people, brought up in a blinding middle class community, be agree to what's ok & whats not ok, in totality?
another quipped. lets not bring mothers into this. i respect mine and she has sacrificed a lot.
reply came for that immediately. yeah, but, now i can't help but ask one. would you be willing to live your life like your mother? you should totally be willing right?
Would
you allow your mother, to do all the things, that you wish to do?
Could it be she, who sits here, having a beach night campfire and
conversations, without a care about tomorrow? Or your father, or
brother, or sister, or child or.. anyone.. can people of all
castes, all ages, all occupations, any nationality be here?
maybe
not little children.. they are to be protected.
Till
what age, will they remain children? Just because, 2 people are
involved in the birthing process, do they OWN that human being (in a
child form).. Can people own land, rivers, hills, flowers…
anything in nature? Can they own themselves? Then.. can a person
cut off his hand or leg.. or commit suicide? Consume any substance?
Poison the land belonging to him/her?
Or
maybe, for that, you need a group.. and sometimes, such groups are
called as a 'nation'.. or it could be religious, or some other lobby
or political group, within that nation, or a multinational clique...
and such hugely powerful groups can amass resources to kill others
and do everything with impunity, and the world will shiver..
you are drifting into another topic man.. came a reminder covered in a drawl, which indicated, i could care less..
ok.. basically, what i would like to know is, the same people, who are so crazy obsessed with well-being and protection of their family or some close friends.. how can they be so cruel to another human being at the same time?? aren't every terrorist, soldier, rebel, homicider, exploiter, corrupt person, part of some family? some group? Dont they fiercely protect their own small group?
another added.. you are drifting. so, lets get back to the old topic, before the mother statements came in. . its all like the question - what's faith and what is blind faith? can even two faithful people agree on that?
either you can break out and see things differently or not. and, i won't divide developed and developing countries.. more like, people with net access and without. as net gives lots of exposure... criss crossing information across world wide through social media and internet.. so, its a choice, whether to see beyond one's boundaries or not. another stated lazily..
(the waves in that beach, seemed to be doing just that kind of thing.. hitting with waves of logic, one after another, against the rigid, hardened land..)
at least the waves never give up, a sleepy voice indicate breaking up of that beach night gathering.
...... (other quotes from that night)...
"if you want freedom, and acceptance from others, to be the way you want, then,
you should be willing to let your mother do all those things as well.. can you? can she?
"to be free, one must be willing to give that same freedom to others as well - the more you practice control over others, you too will remain constricted and constipated".
"everyone complains about, injustice, unfair things happened to them.. or done to them... and the difficulties they have to face.
no one questions the opportunities they get, the happiness and freedom they currently have & had... that's taken for granted. and it creates an imbalance.. as even a small % of problems balloon up!"
...
"people think, its the desire to succeed, the strength of the will or wish, which leads us to that...
but isn't it the desire to do things (which may lead to success or happiness), which is to be strong?
"everyone has 1000's of wishes, but the person, who actively pursues by doing, is the person who succeeds. and sometimes, when a successful person, says on TV/print, that they never wished/expected/planned for it... some of the viewers feel jealous.. (how the hell did she/he got it? such a waste of all that fame/success. here i've been wishing for that since years and nothing).
often the wish or desire is for fame and worship.. which certain success can bring. and that takes the focus on to the fame/fandom... and distracts from actually accomplishing - as focus to achieve what needs to be done remains neglected.
these people become known as complaint boxes, or who perennially talk about all the misfortunes, that befall on them.
probably i would have said, in my younger years, to such a person.. "then why dont you wish for what you get easily? just wish - something should not happen".. then you will get what you want ;)
in sports, we do have such negative wishes, that team should not win, or should not score more than 1 goal.. etc. But negative wishes are draining.. (would you rather keep a goal, "i won't tell lies, or i won't be violent".. or i will be honest, or i will be peaceful? .. maybe its another blog altogether.
teaching Hindi through Bollywood song...
A friend, who is from South of India (where Hindi language is not common), is trying to learn Hindi, and asked me for help. Its not easy to speak a language with someone, who is struggling with even basics of it.. as we chatted on, i realized, he is interested in Hindi or Bollywood songs.. so checked mobile to find a song ('aa raat bhar', from Heropanti (2014))...
it was fun.. him listening to the song, listen to few lines of lyrics, and then trying to figure out, how many words he already knows, and getting to know meaning of unknown words.. interesting way to learn a language. the song /music was good too..
below is the song lyrics and its meaning in English (from: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html)
it was fun.. him listening to the song, listen to few lines of lyrics, and then trying to figure out, how many words he already knows, and getting to know meaning of unknown words.. interesting way to learn a language. the song /music was good too..
below is the song lyrics and its meaning in English (from: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html)
Aa raat bhar.. aa raat
bhar..
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives..
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives..
Aa raat bhar.. aa raat bhar..
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives.. - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html#sthash.ASyiUl3N.dpuf
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives.. - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html#sthash.ASyiUl3N.dpuf
Aa raat bhar.. aa raat bhar..
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives.. - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html#sthash.ASyiUl3N.dpuf
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives.. - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html#sthash.ASyiUl3N.dpuf
Aa raat bhar.. aa raat bhar..
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives.. - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html#sthash.ASyiUl3N.dpuf
Jaayein na ghar.. jaayein naa ghar..
Hai saath tu.. Kya hai fikar
Jaayein na ghar.. aa raat bhar
Come all night, come all night,
let's not go home, let's not go home,
you're with me, what's the worry,
come, let's not go home all night..
Jaayein jahaan jahaan jahaan dil kare
Jaane kahaan kahaan kahaan phir milein
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar
Aa raat bhar, jaayein na ghar
Let's go wherever the heart wishes to,
We don't know where again we'd meet.
Our life should pass in this night.
come, let's not go home all night..
Namkeeniyan hain, nazdeekiyaan hain
Rang hi rang hai nazaaron mein
Hansne lagi hoon, phansne lagi hoon
Armaan dil mein hazaaron hain
There is fun, there is closeness,
there are just so many colors in the scenery..
I'm laughing, I've begun to get entrapped,
there are thousands of wishes in my heart.
Kar paar de sabhi hadein
Gale lagein kabhi nahi hone dein sehar
Is raat mein beete umar, saari umar..
Let's cross all limits,
Let's embrace and not let the morning ever come,
Our life should pass in this night, all our lives.. - See more at: http://www.bollymeaning.com/2014/04/aa-raat-bhar-jaayein-na-ghar-lyrics.html#sthash.ASyiUl3N.dpuf
Friday, April 24, 2015
series 7... self reflection
SR series 7:
would there be a world, without negativity?
when something bad happens, i get frustrated, angry, disappointed, hopeless, stupid and a lot of other things. when my human right is blocked, when someone else in control, enforce their ideas on to me, it becomes hell. i have not met anyone, who has overcome negativity totally..
then, isn't all that, the pain, hurt, injustice, unfair control, suppression etc. part of our life? will they ever go away completely?
then, why do i get so upset with those happenings, even though i have faced them countless times in my life so far? does it make sense to expect only positivity every time? and didn't that pain/hurt etc helped me to grow as well.. forced me to be more creative and develop ways to overcome challenges?
yes.. negativity does exist and has helped me too, even though it has made me miserable and taken me through various shades of uncomfortable states. and i generally try to avoid such states, as anyone else too would.
but, have i accepted that, its all inevitable parts of life? can i accept, just like trees with tasty fruits, nature also has thorny trees and poisonous berries? can i include them into my expectations as well.. or will i keep keeping ONLY positive expectations?
(for me, realizing all this seems like a big thing, though how well i have been able to express, in a clear way i am not so sure.. but i am trying to share.. hope you will feel that way too, about your feedback after reading all this). and, even if you dont share, i will try to accept it calmly as well.. and i need lots of practice ;)
would there be a world, without negativity?
when something bad happens, i get frustrated, angry, disappointed, hopeless, stupid and a lot of other things. when my human right is blocked, when someone else in control, enforce their ideas on to me, it becomes hell. i have not met anyone, who has overcome negativity totally..
then, isn't all that, the pain, hurt, injustice, unfair control, suppression etc. part of our life? will they ever go away completely?
then, why do i get so upset with those happenings, even though i have faced them countless times in my life so far? does it make sense to expect only positivity every time? and didn't that pain/hurt etc helped me to grow as well.. forced me to be more creative and develop ways to overcome challenges?
yes.. negativity does exist and has helped me too, even though it has made me miserable and taken me through various shades of uncomfortable states. and i generally try to avoid such states, as anyone else too would.
but, have i accepted that, its all inevitable parts of life? can i accept, just like trees with tasty fruits, nature also has thorny trees and poisonous berries? can i include them into my expectations as well.. or will i keep keeping ONLY positive expectations?
(for me, realizing all this seems like a big thing, though how well i have been able to express, in a clear way i am not so sure.. but i am trying to share.. hope you will feel that way too, about your feedback after reading all this). and, even if you dont share, i will try to accept it calmly as well.. and i need lots of practice ;)
Thursday, April 23, 2015
why do we have to be honest with ourselves?
April Reflection (AR) series 1:
i must admit, when i was in my early 20's, i was lot more scared than now.. it was all, bit by bit, through gradual exploration, i was able to overcome my cultural conditioning.
the falsehoods weren't swept away like spider webs in a day or two. i am here at my stage, after 20 or more years of 'one step at a time' towards freedom of mind. there's still a long way to go i know.
(though, sometimes, when i see today's youth, i get impatient and want them to jump ahead into that free state quickly.
but, i keep meeting, many youngsters who are already cool with self & nature)
AR series 2:
its generally painful to be honest with others.. but, to be with self, it can be more heart wrenching. (and that's why often we find it easy to lie to self, and accepting some bitter truth about ourselves becomes such an irritant).
but, what could happen? don't people always try to fool self / brain / some parts of brain or thought spectrum, to overcome stage fear, test anxiety, and other million things like approaching a desirable girl/boy?
the long term consequence is what comes up. when we tend to lie to our self, the chances of our decisions (based on our own preferences/liking) tends to go wrong as well. i take up a job, because its prestigious in the eyes of my society, or community, peer group or whatever.. but, soon, i start hating it.. it could be same with partnering up with a girl/boy.. because they are socially approved as, good looking, successful, humorous, can sing or act well, is polite, buys you lots of things etc. leads to later life frustrations.
(then, sometimes, people become possessive and cling on to that relationship, because, there is stigma, if i keep changing partners, and break up indicates, i failed in my decision making. which makes them unhappy and that gets thrown around, leading to an unhappy environment as well).
without being happy inside, how can we share happiness with others? positive energy that is. if we do so, it will be just pretense and sooner or later other people would sense your energy as falsified, and become distant even without being aware of it.
its not easy being honest with self.. (i will be honest with you about it ;)
but, if you do, and keep doing, it takes continuous efforts, then it can lead to better self realization. reduction in confusion about, what am i? how am i? where am i & where am i going? etc. questions wouldn't haunt you as much. just like the way, change in fear levels happen.. as you grow from childhood to maturity, where the old fear of darkness, night, ghosts, some other thing etc. become less intense and threatening, as we mature.. they don't completely go away, but, our self awareness and assurance would have improved.
so, that's it.. no more advertising.. its up to you.. you know yourself best?
AR series 3:
i would say, about couple of years ago, there was a change in me, a very sudden one..
my thinking focused on unknown areas to me, and i traveled / backpacked again.. to be basically with self and to be with positive, peace people (backpackers generally are) and those who share strange unconventional journeys themselves. their vibes helped and i realize now, after 2 years of thinking (you can call it backpacking too).. how i rudely reacted against some people, especially in a second phase of backpacking... and later on too, though less.
it wasn't you, but my own limitations at level of acceptance of others.. even some parts of nature.. repelled me and i would react strongly..
can't say i have control over it, or am better at it, but first step of awareness, and some acceptance is there (which this open letter to all, those i know and those i dont know, may indicate...)
why should i keep hatred in this limited edition of a game?
can i win without cheat codes?
most importantly, can i re-program this game? (played in mind)
reprogramming computer games, i dont know IT that much. but my own life game.. i can code or recode.. i have to learn to do that, otherwise i will keep operating on some other operating system, which wouldn't be suitable to ME version 1.0
i wont be able to change the whole game platform or operating system i was born with, in one go. but i can do gradual, one thing at a time changes..
though the game has to continue while i repair!
its not easy, but who wants to play an easy game? you'd get bored.
so, first of all, i apologize heartfelt, at any or all people, with whom i have reacted in a rude, inhuman way.. i will keep on trying to improve my Non-Violent Communication (NVC)..
though, rather than using a negative to change my attitude & behavior, i say, peaceful, positive, organic growth (sustainable) based communication - is what i will try to achieve. . which also automatically would be ethical..
i would like to reconnect with you all, if possible.. of course, mental wounds take a long time to heal!
AR series 3:
and then, i try to send every one i know, (& dont know), a big mental energy.. think of it as a pure energy embrace.. without reservations, without any thoughts or intentions.. just the way we should embrace nature..
hope such a hug can go viral.. so, share it with all you can.
its easy to connect and encourage people - whom you appreciate more & get irritated the least.
but, expanding our self consciousness & ability to share pure positive energy to others, who are not so close and irritate us more is not so easy...
we can only gradually expand in that direction.. but do try my friend to share positivity as much as you can...
whether you realize it or not, we all are part of this nature and share more similarities with each other than differences. Even our DNA is 99% similar and only 1% is different.. or something like that.
so lets celebrate that 99% of shared matter and send pure energy across to everyone else... or just share... one can't do it all, but all of us can do it one by one.. best wishes!
AR series 4:
Exploring inner self...
when you go inward for self discoveries, have lots of positivity, encouraging energy inside yourself. you should like the place you go, and it should share positive energy with you as well..
for that, you have to be a friend to yoruself.
first, there are conflicting ideals and concepts within one person. but can we accept them, as we accept a friend?
the best practice for that, is by trying to be such a friend overall... improve your friendship connections with others.. its nothing but a part of learning, to treat self as a friend as well...
and there will be automatically enough positivity in you... your introspective journeys will become more & more enjoyable, like backpacking trips.. (or any other joyful activity you prefer).
derive happiness intrinsically and keep sharing it with others.. by sharing it with others, you teach yourself to share internally as well.. (when your own internal concept compete and fight with each other, frustration can be the end result.
often people feel, they can fool others by putting on a facade, by covering up their faces/body and pretending. but, can you fool yourself? so, practice what you want to be done with yourself, with others (you may say, old bottle in new wine... but, wouldn't it make this world a better world be a better place to live in?)
and do you have any other planet to shift to? ;)
AR series 5:
why do we have to be honest with ourselves?
its generally painful to be honest with others.. but, to be with self, it can be more heart wrenching. (and thats why often we find it easy to lie to self, and accepting some bitter truth about ourselves becomes such an irritant).
but, what could happen? dont people always try to fool self / brain / some parts of brain or thought spectrum, to overcome stage fear, test anxiety, and other million things like approaching a desirable girl/boy?
the long term consequence is what comes up. when we tend to lie to our self, the chances of our decisions (based on our own preferences/liking) tends to go wrong as well. i take up a job, because its prestigious in the eyes of my society, or community, peer group or whatever.. but, soon, i start hating it.. it could be same with partnering up with a girl/boy.. because they are socially approved as, good looking, successful, humorous, can sing or act well, is polite, buys you lots of things etc. leads to later life frustrations.
(then, sometimes, people become possessive and cling on to that relationship, because, there is stigma, if i keep changing partners, and break up indicates, i failed in my decision making. which makes them unhappy and that gets thrown around, leading to an unhappy environment as well).
without being happy inside, how can we share happiness with others? positive energy that is. if we do so, it will be just pretense and sooner or later other people would sense your energy as falsified, and become distant even without being aware of it.
its not easy being honest with self.. (i will be honest with you about it wink emoticon
but, if you do, and keep doing, it takes continuous efforts, then it can lead to better self realization. reduction in confusion about, what am i? how am i? where am i & where am i going? etc. questions wouldn't haunt you as much. just like the way, change in fear levels happen.. as you grow from childhood to maturity, where the old fear of darkness, night, ghosts, some other thing etc. become less intense and threatening, as we mature.. they dont completely go away, but, our self awareness and assurance would have improved.
so, that's it.. no more advertising.. its up to you.. you know yourself best?
i must admit, when i was in my early 20's, i was lot more scared than now.. it was all, bit by bit, through gradual exploration, i was able to overcome my cultural conditioning.
the falsehoods weren't swept away like spider webs in a day or two. i am here at my stage, after 20 or more years of 'one step at a time' towards freedom of mind. there's still a long way to go i know.
(though, sometimes, when i see today's youth, i get impatient and want them to jump ahead into that free state quickly.
but, i keep meeting, many youngsters who are already cool with self & nature)
AR series 2:
its generally painful to be honest with others.. but, to be with self, it can be more heart wrenching. (and that's why often we find it easy to lie to self, and accepting some bitter truth about ourselves becomes such an irritant).
but, what could happen? don't people always try to fool self / brain / some parts of brain or thought spectrum, to overcome stage fear, test anxiety, and other million things like approaching a desirable girl/boy?
the long term consequence is what comes up. when we tend to lie to our self, the chances of our decisions (based on our own preferences/liking) tends to go wrong as well. i take up a job, because its prestigious in the eyes of my society, or community, peer group or whatever.. but, soon, i start hating it.. it could be same with partnering up with a girl/boy.. because they are socially approved as, good looking, successful, humorous, can sing or act well, is polite, buys you lots of things etc. leads to later life frustrations.
(then, sometimes, people become possessive and cling on to that relationship, because, there is stigma, if i keep changing partners, and break up indicates, i failed in my decision making. which makes them unhappy and that gets thrown around, leading to an unhappy environment as well).
without being happy inside, how can we share happiness with others? positive energy that is. if we do so, it will be just pretense and sooner or later other people would sense your energy as falsified, and become distant even without being aware of it.
its not easy being honest with self.. (i will be honest with you about it ;)
but, if you do, and keep doing, it takes continuous efforts, then it can lead to better self realization. reduction in confusion about, what am i? how am i? where am i & where am i going? etc. questions wouldn't haunt you as much. just like the way, change in fear levels happen.. as you grow from childhood to maturity, where the old fear of darkness, night, ghosts, some other thing etc. become less intense and threatening, as we mature.. they don't completely go away, but, our self awareness and assurance would have improved.
so, that's it.. no more advertising.. its up to you.. you know yourself best?
AR series 3:
i would say, about couple of years ago, there was a change in me, a very sudden one..
my thinking focused on unknown areas to me, and i traveled / backpacked again.. to be basically with self and to be with positive, peace people (backpackers generally are) and those who share strange unconventional journeys themselves. their vibes helped and i realize now, after 2 years of thinking (you can call it backpacking too).. how i rudely reacted against some people, especially in a second phase of backpacking... and later on too, though less.
it wasn't you, but my own limitations at level of acceptance of others.. even some parts of nature.. repelled me and i would react strongly..
can't say i have control over it, or am better at it, but first step of awareness, and some acceptance is there (which this open letter to all, those i know and those i dont know, may indicate...)
why should i keep hatred in this limited edition of a game?
can i win without cheat codes?
most importantly, can i re-program this game? (played in mind)
reprogramming computer games, i dont know IT that much. but my own life game.. i can code or recode.. i have to learn to do that, otherwise i will keep operating on some other operating system, which wouldn't be suitable to ME version 1.0
i wont be able to change the whole game platform or operating system i was born with, in one go. but i can do gradual, one thing at a time changes..
though the game has to continue while i repair!
its not easy, but who wants to play an easy game? you'd get bored.
so, first of all, i apologize heartfelt, at any or all people, with whom i have reacted in a rude, inhuman way.. i will keep on trying to improve my Non-Violent Communication (NVC)..
though, rather than using a negative to change my attitude & behavior, i say, peaceful, positive, organic growth (sustainable) based communication - is what i will try to achieve. . which also automatically would be ethical..
i would like to reconnect with you all, if possible.. of course, mental wounds take a long time to heal!
AR series 3:
and then, i try to send every one i know, (& dont know), a big mental energy.. think of it as a pure energy embrace.. without reservations, without any thoughts or intentions.. just the way we should embrace nature..
hope such a hug can go viral.. so, share it with all you can.
its easy to connect and encourage people - whom you appreciate more & get irritated the least.
but, expanding our self consciousness & ability to share pure positive energy to others, who are not so close and irritate us more is not so easy...
we can only gradually expand in that direction.. but do try my friend to share positivity as much as you can...
whether you realize it or not, we all are part of this nature and share more similarities with each other than differences. Even our DNA is 99% similar and only 1% is different.. or something like that.
so lets celebrate that 99% of shared matter and send pure energy across to everyone else... or just share... one can't do it all, but all of us can do it one by one.. best wishes!
AR series 4:
Exploring inner self...
when you go inward for self discoveries, have lots of positivity, encouraging energy inside yourself. you should like the place you go, and it should share positive energy with you as well..
for that, you have to be a friend to yoruself.
first, there are conflicting ideals and concepts within one person. but can we accept them, as we accept a friend?
the best practice for that, is by trying to be such a friend overall... improve your friendship connections with others.. its nothing but a part of learning, to treat self as a friend as well...
and there will be automatically enough positivity in you... your introspective journeys will become more & more enjoyable, like backpacking trips.. (or any other joyful activity you prefer).
derive happiness intrinsically and keep sharing it with others.. by sharing it with others, you teach yourself to share internally as well.. (when your own internal concept compete and fight with each other, frustration can be the end result.
often people feel, they can fool others by putting on a facade, by covering up their faces/body and pretending. but, can you fool yourself? so, practice what you want to be done with yourself, with others (you may say, old bottle in new wine... but, wouldn't it make this world a better world be a better place to live in?)
and do you have any other planet to shift to? ;)
AR series 5:
why do we have to be honest with ourselves?
its generally painful to be honest with others.. but, to be with self, it can be more heart wrenching. (and thats why often we find it easy to lie to self, and accepting some bitter truth about ourselves becomes such an irritant).
but, what could happen? dont people always try to fool self / brain / some parts of brain or thought spectrum, to overcome stage fear, test anxiety, and other million things like approaching a desirable girl/boy?
the long term consequence is what comes up. when we tend to lie to our self, the chances of our decisions (based on our own preferences/liking) tends to go wrong as well. i take up a job, because its prestigious in the eyes of my society, or community, peer group or whatever.. but, soon, i start hating it.. it could be same with partnering up with a girl/boy.. because they are socially approved as, good looking, successful, humorous, can sing or act well, is polite, buys you lots of things etc. leads to later life frustrations.
(then, sometimes, people become possessive and cling on to that relationship, because, there is stigma, if i keep changing partners, and break up indicates, i failed in my decision making. which makes them unhappy and that gets thrown around, leading to an unhappy environment as well).
without being happy inside, how can we share happiness with others? positive energy that is. if we do so, it will be just pretense and sooner or later other people would sense your energy as falsified, and become distant even without being aware of it.
its not easy being honest with self.. (i will be honest with you about it wink emoticon
but, if you do, and keep doing, it takes continuous efforts, then it can lead to better self realization. reduction in confusion about, what am i? how am i? where am i & where am i going? etc. questions wouldn't haunt you as much. just like the way, change in fear levels happen.. as you grow from childhood to maturity, where the old fear of darkness, night, ghosts, some other thing etc. become less intense and threatening, as we mature.. they dont completely go away, but, our self awareness and assurance would have improved.
so, that's it.. no more advertising.. its up to you.. you know yourself best?
Wednesday, March 25, 2015
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